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OVER 250,000 GIFTS DELIVERED
Since 2020, our studio in Florida has shipped over 250,000 gifts—and counting.
Our commitment to quality and connection is reflected in our glowing 4.8/5 rating from over 10,000 verified reviews. Every gift we send out is a step toward our goal of bringing people closer together, one gift at a time
MADE IN THE USA
All our products are made with love in the USA.
HAPPINESS GUARANTEE
This product is backed by our 100% Happiness Guarantee.
At Mallard Moon, we deliver high-quality gifts designed to bring joy and connection. If for any reason you're not 100% satisfied, just reach out. We're committed to making it right, or we'll gladly take it back.
READY TO GIVE
All our products are presentably packaged for hassle-free gifting.
SHIPPING INFORMATION
Estimated delivery times:
US: 5-7 business days.
Canada: 5-9 business days
Australia/New Zealand: 5-9 business days
UK & EU: 5-7 business days (ships from Amsterdam)
Rest of the world: 2-4 weeks
*addition 1-3 days lead time for personalized products
Please note: We currently do not deliver Canvases to PO Boxes as UPS does not deliver to PO Boxes, so please provide a different address that we can ship to.
A durable, humor-forward tumbler built for security professionals who value function and a good laugh. This 20oz or 30oz vacuum-insulated tumbler proudly displays the message, 'I May Be A Security Guard, But I Can't Fix Stupid People'—a lighthearted touch that resonates with colleagues, friends, and fans alike.
- Capacity: 20oz or 30oz options to suit short shifts or long days on the job.
- Material & Finish: Black stainless steel with a rugged powder-coated exterior for lasting style and grip.
- Insulation: Vacuum-insulated double-wall design to keep hot drinks hot and cold drinks cold during patrols and errands.
- Lid & Usability: Secure lid to help minimize spills while you’re on the move.
- Care & Maintenance: Stainless steel construction is easy to clean and designed for daily use.
- Ideal Gift: A practical, tongue-in-cheek gift for birthdays, graduations, or everyday appreciation of a security guard in your life.
Whether you’re shopping for a coworker, a loved one, or treating yourself, this tumbler blends practicality with personality. It’s more than just a drink container—it’s a daily reminder to stay hydrated on the job while sharing a smile. Perfect for on-duty shifts, post-briefing breaks, or taking a moment to unwind after a busy night, it’s the kind of gift that’s thoughtful, memorable, and genuinely useful.
Features and details:
- Laser engraved in our workshop – permanent, fade-proof design (not printed or vinyl)
- Black powder-coated stainless steel for a sleek, modern look
- Double-wall vacuum insulation keeps drinks hot or cold for hours
- Durable stainless-steel construction built for daily use
- Clear, spill-resistant lid included
- Fits most cup holders – great for work, travel, and errands
Available sizes:
- 20oz – perfect for everyday coffee or tea
- 30oz – ideal for long days and extra hydration
